Episode 21: Do It, Afraid: If Your Higher Self Could Talk

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Welcome to the Reclaim Podcast. I’m your host, Leah Van Dolder. I’m a weight loss dietitian and a mindset coach, and this program is for you if you’re a busy working woman or a female entrepreneur and you’re ready to take charge of your health, lose weight, and make lasting positive changes in your life. The only kicker is that you’re on the brink of burnout. You’re exhausted, you are frustrated, you’re feeling discouraged and uncomfortable.

This is how I help my clients: by giving you simple, practical, and savvy strategies to help you achieve your goals while reducing your stress, boosting your mood, your energy, and your self-confidence. To learn more about working with me, check out my website at leahvandolder.com. Welcome to the show.

Hey guys, welcome to this week’s episode of the Reclaim Podcast. Let’s get right into it today because I’m going to make it short and mighty and share some things that I feel you need to hear today. I’m going to call this episode, “If Your Higher Self Could Talk.” Let’s go. It’s funny how I get these ideas. I was just out for a run this morning, running by the water and I’m going to be honest with you, yesterday I had a bit of a rough go and I was in this emotional spot at the end of the day.

I went outside and I’m laying on the couch, chatting this stuff out with my husband, telling him how I feel and all that stuff. Sometimes it’s just good to get your thoughts out in the open and just to chat things out because have you ever noticed when you are emotionally charged, you do not think rationally. And when you are emotionally charged, everything seems like such a big deal. Everything seems so extra.

But when you start talking about it, you start to realize like, oh my gosh, I sound absolutely ridiculous. So it gives you that space just to get what’s out that’s been on your mind, that’s been on your heart and just put it out in the open.

And today, I had a feeling that you needed to hear some words from me that are actually, you know, exactly like these words are within you, but I just wanted to be your conscious brain today, especially when you are in a state of emotional distress. I’ll call it because you guys know that I’ve been a weight loss dietitian for 10 years.

Throughout that time, the deep, intimate conversations that I have with women are important because making change in your life is scary, right? It’s really scary. That’s where all this mindset work comes in because our brain is broken down into two parts. We’ve got our subconscious, which is our emotional center, and then we’ve got our conscious, which is executive functioning, problem solving, taking in information. It’s very rational. It’s very logical.

I hear it all the time from women that I work with. They say things like, rationally speaking, logically speaking, I know, I don’t need to take the whole box of cookies to the couch, but yet I do because your subconscious emotional self is taking over. It’s trying to run the show.

And today, the emotion that I’m talking about, the emotion that I want to really meet you where you’re at, is fear. Fear is a very real emotion. Fear stops us from doing a lot of stuff that may be exactly what we need in our life. Fear is very good at talking ourselves out, or when we’re in a state of fear, we’re very good at talking ourselves out of doing something great.

Because fear puts us in this place of lack, right? And we start to question, we start to doubt ourselves, we start to feel depressed and anxious. And we just get stuck in this cycle of, you know, despair and frustration and self-pity and the “I can’ts”. I’m never going to get this right. Bullshit.

I’m going to say a couple of things. Like, if your higher self could talk to you in this level of despair right now, here’s a couple of things that are very true, very real, and will help you get out of a state like that. Some of these go back to childhood, they can go back to specific times in your life where you did not have great experiences. And those are carrying through in your life. And those experiences and the emotions tied with those experiences are possibly holding you back from having the courage to do something that would change the entire trajectory of your life.

So I’m just here to remind you, like, here’s some inner mantra stuff for you. Like, girl, you are beautiful. You are worthy. You’re loved. You’re unique and special just because you’re you. Nobody else on this planet is like you. You’re valuable. And you’re valuable not because of every single single thing that you do in a day. You’re not valuable of how productive you are in a day. You’re valuable simply because you’re you. You’re deserving. And to be quite honest with you, you are an infinite source of energy, creativity, and power. It’s in there. It’s in there.

And I know that when we are, you know, kind of feeling our worst, it’s really hard to remember these amazing things about ourselves. So I just want to remind you of that today. I had a feeling that you needed to hear that. And I just wanted to remind you, like, you can get unstuck.

I’ve had a lot of conversations with women over the last couple of weeks, right? And the time that I’m doing this recording, I mean, it’s spring, summer’s in the air, right? We kind of think about change. We think about, yeah, we think about change for ourselves. And, you know, so many women open up and share like, Oh my gosh, I’m so stuck. I’m so unhappy. I don’t like what I see when I look in the mirror. My nutrition is all over the map. I binge eat. I feel so guilty about it afterwards. And I like, I’m really upset with myself, but yet they don’t do anything about it.

Why is that? Well, I’ve learned over the years that fear is a very powerful emotion. And the most common things, even though women don’t say it flat out to me, because they’ll cover it up with like, Oh, I can’t afford that. It’s not the right time right now. And like, Hey, legit, maybe the money piece isn’t there yet. Maybe the timing isn’t quite right yet. But I’ve also learned that those are just little lines that you throw out to things that are covering up something much deeper. You’re scared. You are allowing fear to run the show. You’re living in a state of fear.

You are living in this pool of self pity and defeat. And in a world of, I don’t know about this, you’re doubting yourself. So you’re scared of failure. Maybe you’re scared of success. You’re scared of getting uncomfortable. That’s really what it is. But uncomfortable is where you grow. Living in that comfort zone over there of yours, it’s sucking the life out of you. And deep down, you know that.

And I’m just here to remind you, like, you can absolutely feel fear. That is an emotion. That’s an emotion that every single one of us experience. But you can do things afraid. You can say yes to things while feeling fear. You can take action on things while feeling fear. You can feel the emotion of fear and do something. Those things can coexist.

I was thinking about the difference between, or what shifts within women’s minds when they finally say yes to themselves, right? They finally say yes to building, creating that healthy and happy vision for themselves. What changes? Courage. Courage just comes out of them. And instead of living in this state of fear, they have a real conversation with themselves. And like, hey, buck up. There’s some courage in there. And they step into that fear. Because I don’t know about you, but any big decision that you’ve made in your life, you feel this combo of emotions of like, holy shit and pure excitement.

So it’s like excitement and terror all in one little package. That’s the perfect combination. Like that is the, like the green flag to advance into doing something. There’s courage in you. There is. So you have a choice here, right? You can continue to live in a state of fear, live in that state of self-pity and self-doubt. Or you can choose to acknowledge that fear and do the damn thing anyway. You can do it afraid. You can. You’ve done it before. You can absolutely do it again.

And I was talking to a client the other day and she’s like, man, I’m so glad I said yes to this. She’s like, it has absolutely changed my life. We started working together two months ago, so 60 days. Your life can change in 60 days. We were chatting yesterday. She’s like, well, I guess I’m going to have to go buy a new pair of shorts. She sent me a picture. There’s like two inches, like gaping from her shorts. She’s lost 12 pounds. She’s lost eight inches. She has more energy than you can shake a stick at. She’s living the life that she has envisioned for herself.

Like these are the magic words that I love hearing from my clients, right? They’re like, oh my gosh, like I’m actually living that active lifestyle that I dreamed of. And this is why I do what I do, because there is nothing more beautiful than seeing women stepping into their fear, drawing out that courage within them, and filling this world with more happy, healthy, energetic, vibrant women. There’s nothing better than that. Like girls, we just run the world.

So I hope you’ve enjoyed this episode today, just really getting deep into your emotions, highlighting some of them that maybe you didn’t realize were there, that we’re holding you back. And just a friendly reminder, you can feel fear and still do something. Do it afraid, step into it, draw out that courage. Step into it, draw out that courage. It’s in you. You’ll be amazed. You’ll be absolutely amazed of what you can create for yourself.

And the other thing, I mean, I’m just going to say it, the pathway to success is literally right under your nose. That’s why I’ve created my coaching program. The pathway is there. It’s available to you. The door is right in front of your face. All you got to do is take the opportunity. All you got to do is grab the handle and turn it.

So if you’re ready to take that opportunity, send me a message on Instagram. Let’s chat about your goals. Let’s chat about, you know, your healthy and happy vision, or apply to work with me, check out my show notes. There’s an application link there, or check out my website, leahvandolder.com to learn a little bit more about myself, see some client stories, learn about my coaching style, coaching program, and we’ll go from there.

Thanks so much for tuning in this week, guys. It was great to connect with you and we’ll catch you in the next episode. Thanks for tuning into this episode of the Reclaim Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode, I encourage you to follow, rate, and review. To learn more about working with me, check out my website at leahvandolder.com.

Thank you again for being here. It means the world to be able to connect with you. Girl, keep doing amazing things. You have everything that it takes to achieve your goals and be successful at anything that you want.